6-7-95
1;35PM
I am all but incapacitated with grief and sadness. And rage. I want to understand, and am trying. Seeking the eye of the hurricane.
1:35am
Cunt, Harsh word, this. Fucking cunt. How can a man who has banished hate from his thoughts, and reaped the benefits of that action, direct these words toward another? I can't stands no more.
The finger does a u-turn. I am, indeed, a poor fool. I pity myself and my circumstances. Now I write for myself. Fuck my career. Fuck my audience. Let humanity fuck itself. What kind of an audacious fuck was I to presume that I could save this god forsaken scum decended species? I was an enlightened fuck.
I write two paragraphs and my rage fizzles. When I was eighteen I could keep it up a lot longer.
I've got a few days left in this second year of the Mean Time. I was hoping to arrive at some kind of point or conclusion by the two year mark. I was hoping for resolution. Fool.
"Shake it off. You'll be alright. Can you still play, or do you want to sit on the bench for a while?"
Yeah yeah, I get the point motherfucker. Yeah, I'll sit on the bench if you'll suck my cock.
With the dream of easy money fading, crime slips into the frame. Armed robbery. Coke runner. Commercial actor. Damn it all to hell. I deserve more than this, this...pathetic, misery drenched, complacent, cowardly, fuck, fuck, fuck. Fuck it.
Reabsorb me mother U, it's no skin off my back. Actually, that's all it is. That fucking bitch sluffed me off into this material world for vibrating too slow to suit her. Cunt. Now I beseach her to take me back. Pathetic. Maybe I could make her an offering of the innocent and the beautiful. I could slay all that I see, freeing Her from the tomb of matter. Maybe then she will take me back. In a hail of bullets. Cunt.
My blood is boiling. Black.
I could feed on the freshly released souls of the newly dashed for millennia, growing fat as a tick, and she could come along and slash me wide. Cunt.
This is a nasty world I am in tonight. No satisfaction.
IO+IO+IO+IO+IO+IO+IO+IO+IO+IO+IO+IO+IO+IO+IO+IO+IO+IO+IO+IO+IO+IO+IO+IO+IO+IO+IO+
I am all but incapacitated with grief and sadness. And rage. I want to understand, and am trying. Seeking the eye of the hurricane.
1:35am
Cunt, Harsh word, this. Fucking cunt. How can a man who has banished hate from his thoughts, and reaped the benefits of that action, direct these words toward another? I can't stands no more.
The finger does a u-turn. I am, indeed, a poor fool. I pity myself and my circumstances. Now I write for myself. Fuck my career. Fuck my audience. Let humanity fuck itself. What kind of an audacious fuck was I to presume that I could save this god forsaken scum decended species? I was an enlightened fuck.
I write two paragraphs and my rage fizzles. When I was eighteen I could keep it up a lot longer.
I've got a few days left in this second year of the Mean Time. I was hoping to arrive at some kind of point or conclusion by the two year mark. I was hoping for resolution. Fool.
"Shake it off. You'll be alright. Can you still play, or do you want to sit on the bench for a while?"
Yeah yeah, I get the point motherfucker. Yeah, I'll sit on the bench if you'll suck my cock.
With the dream of easy money fading, crime slips into the frame. Armed robbery. Coke runner. Commercial actor. Damn it all to hell. I deserve more than this, this...pathetic, misery drenched, complacent, cowardly, fuck, fuck, fuck. Fuck it.
Reabsorb me mother U, it's no skin off my back. Actually, that's all it is. That fucking bitch sluffed me off into this material world for vibrating too slow to suit her. Cunt. Now I beseach her to take me back. Pathetic. Maybe I could make her an offering of the innocent and the beautiful. I could slay all that I see, freeing Her from the tomb of matter. Maybe then she will take me back. In a hail of bullets. Cunt.
My blood is boiling. Black.
I could feed on the freshly released souls of the newly dashed for millennia, growing fat as a tick, and she could come along and slash me wide. Cunt.
This is a nasty world I am in tonight. No satisfaction.
IO+IO+IO+IO+IO+IO+IO+IO+IO+IO+IO+IO+IO+IO+IO+IO+IO+IO+IO+IO+IO+IO+IO+IO+IO+IO+IO+
posted by Dark Sevier at 1:06 AM
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